Once Again I Have No Real Post So It’s Back To Making Fun Of The News

Sooner or later I’ll come up with a new Drunken Rant or actual commentary but till then I’ll just go on with the silliness that is the News Roundups I’ve been doing a lot lately.

This Isn’t The Big Lie, I’ll Explain The Big Lie In a Minute

“The Obama administration appears to be using fuzzy math to count the number of jobs created by the $787 billion stimulus package, according to two analyses that show counters included pay raises and hours worked as actual jobs.”

So here is the original number and how it works out:

787 billion divided by 640 000 = $1, 229,687.5 price per job

Here is the new number and how it works out:

787 billion divided by 620. 000 = $1, 269,354.84 price per job

So the difference between $1, 229,687.5 and $1, 269,354.84 isn’t that much only.  It’s only $39667.34 and not that much compared to the price of the usual shit the government finds ways to waste money on.  No the real problem is that we spent 787 billion dollars to save/create  620,000 jobs at a coast of about 2624 dollars per person in the US. on about 0.02% of the US population.  Before you start complaining about my numbers I used 300 million as the US population just to make it simple the population is a couple million higher than that.

The big lie is that this was supposed to stimulate the economy, it hasn’t done shit, a lot of money did go to help Obama’s friends and his donners but the jobless rate keeps increasing, it’s over 10% the last time I checked meaning we lost a lot more jobs than we have saved.  That is the big lie, the BS we just spent 787 billion on and got shit for.

Pay No Attention To The Fact That He Was Yelling “Allahu Akbar”
The Shooting At Fort Hood Had nothing to do with Islam, really nothing please pay no attention to the religion behind the curtain.

“Major Nidal Malik Hasan, the gunman who killed 13 at America’s Fort Hood military base, once gave a lecture to other doctors in which he said non-believers should be beheaded and have boiling oil poured down their throats. “

Stop it, this has nothing to do with Islam.  Islam is a Peaceful religion so stop making Islam look bad.

“When the sacred months are over slay the idolaters wherever you find them. Arrest them, besiege them, and lie in ambush everywhere for them. If they repent and take to prayer and render the alms levy, allow them to go their way. God is forgiving and merciful.” – Koran, Sura 9:5

Fuck…  Never Mind.

Wait!  It’s about combat stress right?  Yeah, sure, most people off themselves over that if they are going to do anything.  Yeah they sometimes hurt other people but it is rare (unless it’s a bar fight) and they don’t usually scream “Allahu Akbar” while they are doing it.  In fact I think this is the first time someone has.

Considering He Spent His Formative Years Hanging Out With Communists And Even Have Them On Staff Why Is Anyone Surprised By This?
“The president does not plan to travel to Germany to attend the 20th anniversary celebration Monday of the fall of the Berlin Wall, drawing heated criticism from those who say he’s ignoring a shining triumph of American-inspired democracy.”

I don’t think Bill Ayers is celebrating either.  Really Obama has had admitted communists on staff, plus he has people still on staff that are at least sympathetic to communism, why is anyone Surprised by this.  I know because people expect him to lie about it a little better and not make is quite so obvious.  But Really, the guy hung out with communists, his parents were communists and he admitted to intentionally seeking out Marxist professors in college.  Obama might not be a communist, but he is sympathetic.

Can we pretend he did not say that?

I didn’t Know Africa Was A Plumber

“Giant Crack in Africa Will Become New Ocean”

Geology can be fun.  Especially when you’re 4 beers into this post and all you can think about is a sophomoric butt joke.  Must be an adult.  Must be an adult.  Must be an adult…

Fuck it!  Can someone tell Africa to pull his pants up?

A Woman’s Right To Have An Abortion Is Sacred…  Oh God, What the Hell Are You Doing To That Baby!?

“The former director of a Planned Parenthood clinic in southeast Texas says she had a “change of heart” after watching an abortion last month — and she quit her job and joined a pro-life group in praying outside the facility

Abby Johnson, 29, used to escort women from their cars to the clinic in the eight years she volunteered and worked for Planned Parenthood in Bryan, Texas. But she says she knew it was time to leave after she watched a fetus “crumple” as it was vacuumed out of a patient’s uterus in September.

‘When I was working at Planned Parenthood I was extremely pro-choice,” Johnson told FoxNews.com. But after seeing the internal workings of the procedure for the first time on an ultrasound monitor, “I would say there was a definite conversion in my heart … a spiritual conversion…”

I always hated the pro-life crowd that always held up the signs of dead babies.  I don’t agree with abortion, it’s wrong I know, I just never liked seeing that shit.  But after this don’t bother with the pictures, just show everyone a video.  You can call it emotional blackmail if you want, but so was forcing the local Germans in WWII to look at the inside of a concentration camp if we are going that route.  It’s showing the truth, and the truth needs to be seen.

“Johnson said she became disillusioned with her job after her bosses pressured her for months to increase profits by performing more and more abortions, which cost patients between $505 and $695.

“Every meeting that we had was, ‘We don’t have enough money, we don’t have enough money — we’ve got to keep these abortions coming,’” Johnson told FoxNews.com. “It’s a very lucrative business and that’s why they want to increase numbers.”

So is the abortion industry about “woman’s health” or making money off infanticide?  Remember kids Planned Parenthood was set up as a eugenics program, and if that doesn’t bother you, you need help.

Stop It.  Just Stop It Already!

“Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez told the military and civil militias today to prepare for war as a deterrent to a U.S.-led attack after American troops gained access to military bases in neighboring Colombia.”

I know this kind of bullshit might have worked at least a little with your more idiotic followers but Obama is president.  He can’t even fake it enough to look like he wants to win the wars he is already dealing with why the hell do you think he is going to start another one?  Plus you are both leftist demagogues, you’re on the same side.  Granted Obama is at least sane, incompetent childish and a crybaby but he is at least a sane man-child.  Anyway as I have said before Chavez is an annoying asshole, but he has reason for it.

“We all know this is because Chavez needs the propaganda and this kind of thing to maintain power.  Kim Jong-il has been using the “inevitable invasion” of North Korean by America and their lap-dogs in the South for years to control his little Hermit Kingdom, and Castro has used America for years in order to maintain his power.  Dictators need an enemy, they need propaganda, they need the threat of war.”

I should quote myself more often, I like me…

Anyhoo, Obama is not going to start a war, he doesn’t even want to fight the one he’s in. Columbia doesn’t want to start a war otherwise they would have done it by now considering Chavez’s support of Columbia arch-enemy the FARC.  And this friends is what you call “Propaganda”.  I just hope Chavez is still sane enough not to start the shit himself.

Please Stop With The Obama Propaganda In Our Schools

“11 Uncovered Videos Show School Children Performing Praises to Obama”

Now before you start yelling that I only care because I don’t like Obama, shut the fuck up!  We do not sign praises to politicians!  I liked Reagan, but if I see people making their children, or teachers making children sing songs of praise to Reagan I’m going to get pissed off.  We are better than this.  We are a Constitutional Republic and we don’t do these kinds of things, despotisms do!  Please knock of the Obama-cult shit!

This Is Not Going To Work

“The health care reform bill awaiting debate in the House assumes millions of workers and employers would rather pay $167 billion in fines than purchase or provide adequate coverage, according to a recent analysis, raising questions about whether the plan does enough to make insurance affordable.”

So what happens if people don’t pay the 167 billion?  Wouldn’t the system collapse for lack of funds?  If you are going to create something you might want to make sure you can pay for it.  Yes it would be nice if everyone paid for their own health insurance, but if you are hoping that you can pay for this with people who don’t have it you might want to make sure that they can’t get it or the funds are going to dry up.  Granted this could just be a sick way to end up forcing everyone into a single payer government-run program but the government would never try to do that would they?

Fuck…

White Woman Cannot Dress Like Lil’ Wayne For Halloween

“Dallas Cowboys Cheerleader Whitney Isleib has inadvertently stepped into a Halloween controversy by reportedly dressing up as soon-to-be incarcerated rapper Lil’ Wayne in black-face.”

I’m going with the “This is silly” argument.  I’ll let some of the commentators give you what’s up:
moonzip:

“Blackface? BLACKFACE?!?!? That term pertains to a specific,archaic practice, which, I hate to tell them, has nothing to do w/ Halloween! My friend, who is caucasian, LOVES Jimi Hendrix, and came to my H’ween party dressed like him. He made himself up, including his skin tone, to match closer to Hendrix’s – OR NO ONE WOULD’VE KNOWN WHO HE WAS”

Whitechics:
“It’s stupid if the news reports this why not report when Eddie Murphy dressed up as An old Jewish Man.Or Dave Chapelle did a white faced news reporter? or even the white chics movie done by The Wayans brothers.”

societyisoutofcontrol:

“I cannot believe that this was even brought to the public’s attention. Who cares what she dressed up as, it’s Halloween and The United States of America is also a free country, correct? I am SO sick of reverse discrimination. Would anybody care if a black person painted their body with white paint and dressed up as Kid Rock? Nope, but a white girl dresses up as a black male rapper and all h*(# breaks loose. Let’s try have the Caucasian Grammy’s vs the Latin Grammy’s that are on tonight, let’s have caucasian history month, let’s try to set up one organization, one college, one anything referring to only caucasian’s and we’re racist….. double standards… It’s time for people to realize that all people are people regardless of the color of their skin and every citizen of The United States has a right to dress up for Halloween as whomever they chose and if another person finds it offensive, get over it !!!”

imacircusmidget:

“The Wayans brothers dress up as white girls and make a make a movie called “White Chicks” and mock them throughout and it’s….ok?”

Please can we knock off the bullshit!!!  Seriously this “Post-Racial America” thing isn’t working out so well.

Well Thank You Asshole For The Fact Half My High School Had To Take Medication For Exposure to Tuberculosis

“A Los Angeles doctor has allegedly found a creative way to speed up his workflow.

Levon Tebelekian, 72, is accused of giving medical clearance to immigrants applying for U.S. visas by allegedly falsifying the results of medical exams and lab tests, the Los Angeles Times reported.

In one case, he allegedly told an undercover ICE agent that he was not going to “disturb his blood” and that he “did not look like he had AIDS,” according to an affidavit.”

OK I will admit it might not have been this assholes fault since I’m from the East Coast but come the fuck on!  I know you can’t be 100% on everything but at least try to protect the country a little from shit.  “He did not look like he had AIDS…”  Really?  If people “looked” like they had AIDS it would spread very far now would it?

And on with the end or something

Am I ripping off Fark with the joke headlines?  I’m not going to stop I just want to know if you care.

I hate it here…

Internet Tests: Politics, Idiocy And A Good Beer

I was taking one of those online tests to see your political orientation and I think it’s a little off.  I don’t think all the test questions were very good and there was no way to pick neither on any of the questions.  I have taken it before as a joke and thought it was silly but I got to thinking about it while commenting on Afrocity’s blog and figured I just write a post about it here than put all of this crap into her comments section.  Anyway, I am going to go through some of the worse questions on it.  Mind you I took the question right off the site and did not correct for any spelling or grammatical errors so I don’t want to hear it, unless it’s my error and to theirs, even then I still might not care.

Well let us start already:

“If economic globalisation is inevitable, it should primarily serve humanity rather than the interests of trans-national corporations?”

I can’t pick neither.  Can’t it serve both?  Should it serve either?  In my opinion it should be about giving both the freedom to do what they need to do and no hinder either while making sure neither can wrong the other.  But in this case should I say I disagree since I’m for Capitalism and every time people talk about serving humanity it ends up being at the expense of others (such as wealth redistribution)?

“The enemy of my enemy is my friend?”

Sometimes yes, sometimes no.

“People are ultimately divided more by class than by nationality?”

I think it’s both the same.  I think it can have more to do with culture much of the time.

“Governments should penalise businesses that mislead the public?”

How is this a left-right argument, isn’t fraud, fraud?

“A genuine free market requires restrictions on the ability of predator multinationals to create monopolies?”

A company can only become a monopoly by government mandate that stops competition or by creating a superior product and continuing to make it better than all the competition so that people wont go someplace else and technically that is not a monopoly but can get close such as iPods (you know you have one) .  So while I would say I agree with this I think there is a lot more to think about than simple “evil company”.  A question like this could take a dissertation to answer.

“All authority should be questioned?”

Also I don’t think this is a left-right question, if you say yes it will put you on the left if you say no it puts you on the right.  But if you are a communist you don’t question authority.

“Schools should not make classroom attendance compulsory?”

Not a left-right question and would also require a dissertation to answer on any side.  What happened to free will?  If we are going to make everyone pay for public education maybe we should send a bill to the students for any class they fail?

“It’s natural for children to keep some secrets from their parents?”

Not a left-right question.  It’s not even a political one.

“When you are troubled, it’s better not to think about it, but to keep busy with more cheerful things?”

Not Political. It’s a pointless question.  Any side could say both yes or no.

“What’s good for the most successful corporations is always, ultimately, good for all of us?”

Can be both Yes and No.  It’s called ” situational”.

“In a civilised society, one must always have people above to be obeyed and people below to be commanded?”

Yes and No.  We have rules for a reason, and put people in charge of things for a reason.  The reason is not always good but it’s not always bad.  This can only be true if you believe in some form of totalitarian government something I would say is never what I would call “civilized”.

“Abstract art that doesn’t represent anything shouldn’t be considered art at all?”

Not Political. It’s a pointless question.  It’s about personal taste.  I personally think most abstract art is crap.  I also think Van Gogh’s The Starry Night is brilliant and his Wheatfield with Crows is shit.  I also enjoy the art in comic books.  To me most modern art sucks a fat one, much of it I can’t understand how it’s even called art.  Kind of like people calling most of the shit on MTV or the radio “music”.  It’s not.

“The businessperson and the manufacturer are more important than the writer and the artist?”

If I check yes I’m right-wing if I check no I’m left-wing.  Bullshit question since It depends on the situation.  However an artist never saved millions of lives, a businessman and a scientist working together have.

“Mothers may have careers, but their first duty is to be homemakers?”

First duty is to be a mother, as it is the first duty of the father to be a father, but if I check no as in it is not a mother’s first duty to be a homemaker it is assuming I am talking about sexism rather than something else.

“Making peace with the establishment is an important aspect of maturity?”

Cannot be answered until the “establishment” is defined.

“Astrology accurately explains many things?”

Pointless question.  But the answer is still no, no it does not.

“Some people are naturally unlucky?”

Pointless question.

“It is important that my child’s school instills religious values?”

Not political.  Or at least it shouldn’t be.

“Sex outside marriage is usually immoral?”

Too black and white.  Not Political.  Religiously it is, and even non-religious can see the benefits to society of abstinence.  Can we just say it’s better to be abstinent till marriage without turning it into a “pervert” vs “religious fanatic” argument?

“A same sex couple in a stable, loving relationship, should not be excluded from the possibility of child adoption?”

Yes to a point but mostly no.

“No one can feel naturally homosexual?”

Science has yet to be able to answer this how can anyone else 100% in any direction?  It can be personal belief but that is about as far as we can go.

“These days openness about sex has gone too far?”

11-year-old girl gives birth…  Need I say more?  OK, the question is more social than political and plus there is some middle ground, not much but there is some.

On to the end:

Really I think a lot of the test is bullshit, but I guess it’s better than everyone calling each other a fascist all day even if they have no idea what it really means other than “Bad”.  Oh it might be bad but there is a little more to it than that.  Now we can all fight about what little square we got on a silly test.  Granted the test is at least better than the strait line people used to use for this sort of thing, but it could use some work, granted I think it would end up like a collection of interweaving spider webs and all sorts of other unmanageable silliness to really to show the truth but I’m not going to bother trying to make that one, I have dinner to cook, beer to drink and  books to read.

 

I hate it here, and so does Deus Ex Machina who is still recovering from the tentacle attack.  Poor girl, I tried to bring her flowers and some hot soup but she wouldn’t stop shooting at people who got close to her house.

 

Fucking Llamas…

Things You Can Never Unsee

So I was out on Halloween and while walking through a part of Shibuya that is filled with clubs and love motels and I saw a European couple walking down the street.  The girl was dressed kind of slutty, I think in a zombie nurse outfit (normal enough) but the guy was wearing spandex, it was almost a costume I think, but it was so tight you could count the herpes blisters,  it was not right, not right at all.  Either way the guy (other than the disturbing costume) was walking down the street holding a blow up doll smeared with the fake tanning shit.  It was disturbing to say the least but then it only got worse as I watched the couple walk into a love motel.  I wish I hadn’t seen that, I really wish I hadn’t seen that.

No I don’t have a picture so don’t ask.  If you want to see something like that I recomend you drink Drano before it’s too late.

All The Irritation I Missed Last Time: Or I Make Fun Of Current Events

Really, I Hadn’t Noticed

“Rep. Barney Frank (D-MA) says Democrats are “trying on every front to increase the role of government.”

The only This about this that’s newsworthy is that a politician told the truth.
Congratulations You Earn Yourself A Punch In The Face

“Indeed, the eco-revolution that began with blue boxes and the exile of aerosol 25 years ago has evolved into a consumer-scape in which double-bagging makes you a veritable environmental terrorist.

So discovered Robin Roo when she recently asked to have her groceries placed in plastic bags. The Toronto nurse was immediately admonished by both the cashier and the person behind her in line, who suggested that she “strongly consider re-usable bags” in the future.”

Seriously if this happens to me I might hit you.  Or I am going to have a long talk with you manager.  All I want is some ground beef and jalapeno flavored potato chips so hear a sermon from the idiot working the cash register.  Or the idiot behind me in line.

“Dajana Fabjanovich, a communications consultant from Edmonton, says she’ll “absolutely pass eco-judgment on others,” due mainly to her belief that it’s the little things that often make the biggest environmental impact.

“Whenever I spot something that could be recycled in our garbage at home, I will call out to my husband, ‘We are a recycling family!’ ” says Fabjanovich, 34.

“(And) when I drive by our neighbours’ back alleys, I almost always check to see how many blue recycling bags they’ve put out for pickup.”

Dajana is a nutcase.  She’s like her own little eco-friendly version of Big Brother looking out for Greencrimes.  I would like to warn everyone that it is not a bright idea to come to my house to rifle through my trash while on some pompous and misguided crusade, since I will probably hurt you, badly.  Look if you want to recycle do it, I do, but unlike you I don’t have to act like a holier-than-thou eco-douche.  So title of the article was “Most Canadians now see environmental irresponsibility as social faux pas“, yet somehow they didn’t notice while reporting on the lady getting harassed by people while at the store that it is also a “faux pas” to accost someone and berate them in public over something like a grocery bag.

Cult Dedicated To Fraud Convicted Of Fraud

“PARIS (AP) – A Paris court convicted the Church of Scientology of fraud and fined it more than euro600,000 ($900,000) on Tuesday, but stopped short of banning the group’s activities.”

What the Church of Scientology convicted of fraud, how could that happen?  No really how could it when the whole thing was created to scam people out of money, like a pyramid scheme or having John Edwards as your lawyer.  The entire history of Scientology is filled with nothing more than fraud, murder, intimidation and duping idiots out of money.  How the hell it is considered a religion I have no idea.   For a nice and funny look into Scientology go here. Sorry I could not embed it, or I did not bother taking the time.

 

For the less funy parts of this cult watch this:

.

 

The Cultural Revolution Comes To Chicago

“Chicago and Cook County residents aren’t the only ones about to get shocking tax news; the city is debuting a “tax whistle-blower” plan that could turn neighbor against neighbor in Chicago’s business community.

The folks at city hall will pay cash bounties to informants who turn in business tax cheats around the city. The reward would amount to some sort of percentage of the tax money that the city recovers.

“It’s just another way of bringing people into compliance,” Revenue Department spokesman Ed Walsh told the Sun-Times.”

Yes folks denounce your neighbors, denounce your parents, can’t let the Reactionaries and bourgeois get away with their crimes against our workers paradise.  Look I’m not saying people should cheat on their taxes, but every other asshole in Chicago is going to either turn people in hoping for a pay out or use this as an excuse to go after their competitors.  Think about it all you need to do it turn in the guy across  the street so he gets saddled with the legal bills from this and even if it turns out to be nothing you have screwed him over and he might not recover.  Another thing is that considering Chicago has a massive crime rate and some of America’s if not the worlds most corrupt political culture I think they have bigger things to worry about than a couple people that might be cheating on their taxes.  Plus if we got rid of all the tax cheats how will Obama ever find his political appointees?

 

OK, I’m done fow now, have fun and remember kids that I hate it here…

Thursday News Roundup And Other Atrocities

OK, I’m back from my sabbatical to the local emergency room and then the mental institution and it’s time to get back to work.  Lucky for you I feal fine and the Drunken Llama is in hiding from all the death threats he received over his attempt at humor and will not be joining us.

Um, You Have Been Told You Will All Still Have To Pay For This Shit Right?

“Amendment Would Let Kansas Opt Out of Potential Health Reforms”

It’s good to know you remember what the 10th Amendment is but the Federal Government doesn’t and they will still had you a bill.  Unless you can make sure your taxpayers are not sending money to D.C. to pay for their little idiotic ideas you will just be paying for other people crappy medical insurance and not even getting the chance to let it kill you too.  What you really need to do is sue the shit out of Congress for violating your Constitutional Rights in the hope you can keep your money from getting stollen.  Granted that lawsuit will probably end with a lot of political bullshit if D.C. even lets it get into a court in the first place.

New York Builds Wall To Keep People Fleeing To The West

“New Yorkers are fleeing the state and city in alarming numbers — and costing a fortune in lost tax dollars, a new study shows.

More than 1.5 million state residents left for other parts of the United States from 2000 to 2008, according to the report from the Empire Center for New York State Policy. It was the biggest out-of-state migration in the country.

The vast majority of the migrants, 1.1 million, were former residents of New York City — meaning one out of seven city taxpayers moved out.”

Who would have thought that people didn’t like high taxes and and outragiously high cost of living?  Really, did New York think they could just tax people into the ground and people would just get up and move?  I know you professors at Columbia told you that the Berlin Wall was to keep people from fleeing West Germany into the Socialist Utopia that was East Germany but it was the other way around.  The wall was to keep people in, New York However has no such wall.  I will have to ask all the NY carpetbaggers the same thing I ask of the Californian carpetbaggers, not to bring in your idiotic political notions that got you all into the mess you are running from in the first place.  If you want to tax people into the ground go ahead and see what happens when they start leaving and taking their money with them.  I believe the phrase is “Killing the Golden Goose”, once you do it you’re fucked.

 

Japan Forgets Obama’s Ascension Brought World Peace, Continues With Missile Shield

“Japanese naval forces successfully shot down a medium-range missile off Hawaii in a test of Tokyo’s missile defense weaponry, the US military said on Wednesday.

A Japanese destroyer detected, tracked and knocked out the missile in mid-flight with an SM-3 interceptor rocket, the US Missile Defense Agency (MDA) said in a statement.”

Apparently Japan didn’t get the memo that now Obama is in power there will never be another war and all nuclear weapons are all gone (hence the Nobel Prize), since they are still working on that silly little missile shield all the smart people know will never work (this who article is a lie, nothing happened, the CIA and Haliburton made it all up to get DarthCheney a daytime Emmy), maybe Poland and Czech Republic should talk to them about missile defense since Obama decided we shouldn’t help them even if they are soon to be in firing range of a murderous and insane country to the south.  Never mind the murderous and insane country to the east.
And Now I’m Going To Pretend I’m Surprised

“During his first nine months in office, President Obama has quietly rewarded scores of top Democratic donors with VIP access to the White House, private briefings with administration advisers and invitations to important speeches and town-hall meetings.

High-dollar fundraisers have been promised access to senior White House officials in exchange for pledges to donate $30,400 personally or to bundle $300,000 in contributions ahead of the 2010 midterm elections, according to internal Democratic National Committee documents obtained by The Washington Times.”

What?!  NOOOOOO!!! The Obamessiah would never allow himself to get bought off for money to help him get into power, he’s a new kind of politician, he’s The ONE, our Hope for Change, the…  Oh Fuck it…  I can’t do it any more, it’s over,  Really did anyone with half a brain really thing he was anything more than another politician?  A politician from Chicago, a place know for only four things; very cold wind, massive political corruption, dead people voting (or massive voter fraud), and an insanely high murder rate.

But What Happens When We Do Need It

“Obama, who signed the National Defense Authorization Act for Fiscal Year 2010 in an elaborate East Room ceremony at the White House, said the bill finally cuts wasteful weapons projects that some lawmakers have spent years trying to kill. Among them is the Cold War-era F-22 fighter that critics have said is poorly suited for the battles in Iraq and Afghanistan.”

Just because the F-22 isn’t needed in  in Iraq and Afghanistan doesn’t mean we won’t need it some other time, war is not going to go away any time soon, no matter how many times Obama gets a Nobel Prize.  We also didn’t need submarines in the Korean War but that doesn’t mean we should have gotten rid of the things after 1946, we needed them later didn’t we?  Afghanistan is a land locked country, does that mean we should get rid of all of our mine sweepers since we don’t need them at this moment?  Yes sometimes things become obsolete, the F-22 is not one of them, and the day we end up in a war with a country with a real air force we are going to wish we had them.  Japan, South Korea want them, but no we won’t even let our own allies buy the things.  If we are lucky they will just find a way to build something themselves and then when the time come and we realize we fucked up we can try to buy them off those guys, and hopefully they will not give us the finger.

Why Is This In a Defense Bill?

In the same legislation form earlier:

“And the legislation includes a measure — the Matthew Shepard and James Byrd, Jr. Hate Crimes Prevention Act– that authorizes the Justice Department to investigate and prosecute violent attacks in which the perpetrator has targeted a victim because of the his or her actual or perceived race, color, religion, national origin, gender, sexual orientation, gender identity or disability.”

OK, why is this in a defense bill, even if this should become law shouldn’t this be a separate item?    Matthew Shepard’s murder was not a “hatecrime” it was a robbery, a violent one that led to his death. Matt might have been gay, but it was still just a robbery that turned to murder.  I’m not saying the bastards that killed him shouldn’t be punished, they should get the chair (they didn’t), but calling this a hate crime is silly.  The idea of “Hate Crimes” are silly to begin with, all crimes are evil, punish the person for the act, their thoughts might be a motive, but you cannot criminalize thoughts, or more to the point you shouldn’t criminalize thoughts because it never leads anyplace good.

The Fastest Way To Show You’re Lying

North Korea claims it is the greatest and most advanced country in the world.  They then make it illegal for their people to leave and find out the truth.

The East Germany Claimed to be a better place to live than West Germany.  They Then Build a wall to keep people from leaving.

Southern Democrats claimed Blacks were inferior.  They then made it illegal for them to learn to read and write so they could “prove” it.

“Iran’s supreme leader said Wednesday that questioning the results of Iran’s June presidential election is a crime, his strongest warning yet to opposition leaders who continue to insist the vote was rigged.”

See the pattern yet?

If you want to prove something is true you don’t make asking questions illegal, you only do that to hide the truth.  You also don’t have to beat and murder the people asking questions if you not lying out your ass.    At least if you are going to lie your happy ass off do a better job of it.  Make up a bunch of fake reports and have a fake panel of investigators look into the matter and have nice little fake hearings and make it all look legit like they do in Venezuela.  Come on guys I know you don’t have a very firm grasp on reality but you could at least try a little.  You’re like John Wayne Gacy walking around town with a shirt that says “I’m Not The Guy Killing Your Children” while he’s covered in blood.

Come And Get Me You Freaks

“A few pen strokes thrust Kurt Westergaard into the midst of an international crisis, exposing him to death threats and an alleged assassination plot.

Terror charges brought against two Chicago men this week show the 74-year-old Dane remains a potential target for extremists, four years after he drew a caricature of the Prophet Muhammad wearing a bomb-shaped turban.

“I am an old man so I am not so afraid anymore,” Westergaard said Tuesday in an interview with Jyllands-Posten, the Danish newspaper that first published his drawing in September 2005 along with 11 other cartoons of Muhammad.

The drawings triggered an uproar a few months later when Danish and other Western embassies in several Muslim countries were torched by angry protesters who felt the cartoons had profoundly insulted Islam.

Islamic law generally opposes any depiction of the prophet, even favorable, for fear it could lead to idolatry”.

Don’t back down, if you do the bastards win.  Freedom of Speech and of the Press is part of the life blood of civilized and free societies.  Appeasement hasn’t worked yet, and it defiantly isn’t going to work against people who believe that killing anyone that doesn’t agree with them is the holy order from god.  These people are crazy, they will kill goats  for showing their private parts and ban woman from buying cucumbers.  They don’t understand reason, you cannot work out your differences over a beer, they want to kill you.

So If It’s Fine To Only Hire Black Cops In Black Neighborhoods, Is If Fine To Only Hire White Cops In White Neighborhoods?

“EAST ST. LOUIS — City officials seeking a new police chief passed up the former director of the Florida Highway Patrol, who formerly was a top commander of the Illinois State Police, because he is white, two former members of a city board claim.”

This Post-Racial America thing isn’t working out very well is it?  Seriously I don’t know if the accusations are true but if they are this is screwed up.  You can’t have different standards for different people, it’s not going to work very well.  Racism is Racism no matter who it comes from, and Racism is wrong.  It’s always wrong.  Yes this is coming from the site that let a Drunken Llama post terrible jokes the other day but that was jokes, and the same kind of shit was funny when it was on The Chappelle Show and you know it, this is fucking with people lives.    The point is we need to get past this race bullshit, and fast, we are not fucking Crayola Colors and segregation is wrong no matter who does it.

The Logical End Of The Twinkie Defense

“TRENTON, N.J. —  A Florida man accused of killing his son-in-law in New Jersey is arguing that he was unable to commit the crime because he was too fat.”

Remember if the Twinkie Defense isn’t working you can always change it up a it and claim the Twinkies made you so fat that you couldn’t possible have gotten off the couch long enough to kill anyone.  Pay no attention that it doesn’t take a lot of effort to pull a trigger your flabby arms are so heavy that you couldn’t possible lift a gun long enough to shoot someone.  Back in reality fat people can kill people, they just have a harder time running from the cops.

Pay No Attention To The Billions Of Animals That Use The Ocean For A Toilet Every Minute

“Federal Agencies Raise Alarm About Cruise Sewage”

What, they dump crap in the ocean, a place filled with fish crap?  NOOOOOOO!!!  I do find the update at the bottom funny, were a VP for a cruse line explains how they treat the crap exceeds what is necessary under the law.  You know the law, something that comes from “Federal Agencies”?

“Eric Ruff, executive vice president for public policy and communications of the Cruise Lines International Association, has responded to this story with the following statement:

The Foxnews.com story entitled “Federal Agencies Raise Alarm About Cruise Sewage” omits key information and is flat wrong about the current state of environmental practices within our industry, particularly related to the discharge of black water or “sewage.” No black water is discharged into the ocean by CLIA members before it is treated.

Regulators have set requirements on effluent quality for every discharge from a ship in U.S. waters. CLIA members (we represent 97 percent of North American cruise business) use technology and follow practices and procedures that meet, and in most cases exceed, these requirements. In many cases, the purified wastewater effluent from a cruise ship is cleaner than that of many municipalities.

It is regrettable your reporter failed to contact the industry for this information. Moreover, the EPA, in its December 2008 Cruise Ship Discharge Assessment Report, commended industry for its solid waste (cans, glass, paper, etc) management practices. The report noted the cruise industry’s overall environmental standards are “designed to increase compliance with regulatory regimes and in some cases incorporate voluntary standards and procedures that go beyond what is required by law or regulation.”

Remember It’s Wrong To Spy On Us, Even If We Send A Lot Of Money To A Domestic Marxist Narco-Terrorist Organization Trying To Destroy You.

“Venezuela says it has captured pair of Colombian spies”

Venezuelan authorities have captured two Colombian spies, says President Hugo Chavez, who also is accusing the United States of being behind efforts to destabilize his leftist government.

The Colombian Administrative Department of Security, known by its Spanish acronym DAS, denies any espionage against Venezuela.

Chavez said the two Colombians will be put on trial.

“When a hostile government increases its investigations, daring to violate international accords … that indicates there are plans against Venezuela, and behind those Colombians is the hand of the CIA and the U.S.,” Chavez said Tuesday. “Respect us like we respect Colombian sovereignty.”

Francisco Arias Cardenas, the Venezuelan vice minister of foreign affairs for Latin America, said the government sent a protest note to the Colombian Foreign Ministry.

“DAS agents were captured spying, which violates the agreements of the Charter of Nations between brother countries, and we reject such actions,” Arias Cardenas said Tuesday.

He said the Venezuelan Foreign Ministry demanded that the Colombian government “stop … activities in Venezuelan territory that are not friendly or fraternal at all.”

Can Someone please tell Hugo to shut up, it stopped being funny 8 years ago.  Look even if they are Columbian spies I don’t care, Hugo Chavez sends tonnes of money to the FARC, a Marxist terrorist group that kidnaps people and produces drugs.  They also what to destroy the Columbian government, of course they are going to spy on Venezuela.  It would be like America fighting Hitler and pretending Mussolini didn’t exist.   Chavez you and the FARC have always been in bed together so stop bitching about things you should expect to happen.  Also Mr. Chavez every time you mention the CIA you make yourself sound crazier than we already think you are.  If the CIA gave a shit about you they would have either killed you by now or they can’t do it.  Either way you don’t have anything to worry about (well other than the fact your countries economy is collapsing, but that’s your fault not the CIA).

OK, I’m Done, I ran out of stories to make fun of and don’t have the urge to look for more right now.  Have fun, please remember pay no attention to the Llama, he’s an asshole and always remember to watch out for the Tentacles…

White Interloper Steals Beauty Pageant From Black School

My first reaction to a news article was:

“Oh No, White Girl Wins Beauty Pageant At Black School”

Then I thought about it, I searched deep in my soul while I  thought about this:

“A university student has provoked a race storm after she was crowned as the first white winner of a beauty pageant at a predominantly black university…

The five judges crowned her over the nine other contestants – all of whom were black. She was the first white woman to win the title at the university.

But the backlash began almost immediately, with some of the audience walking out of the auditorium as the announcement was made. In a traditional winners’ photograph, two of the black runners-up are seen scowling into the camera.

The next day Ms Churchill was heckled at a university football game. Previous winner Patrece Parson said she was ‘very shocked’ at the judge’s choice of a white woman, adding: ‘We’ve never had one before.”

Really my question is why a white woman was allowed to even get into a black school, really it’s a “Black School”, white people shouldn’t be allowed to go to them, they are for black people and only black people damn it!  Not only did they let this white interloper into a black school they let her enter a pageant and even let her win the thing.  Shame on all of you, how the hell are we ever going to get to Obama’s Post-Racial America if we start letting white people into black schools?  Look I know the Civil Rights Movement was a good thing but I think it has gone too far when you are letting white people into black schools.  It’s Gentrification, and we can’t have that.  We must stop the White Devils and their evil plans.  Because we all know the white man is evil and racist and just wants to bring back segregation and put us all in…  Wait… Oh fuck…

Sorry, the writer of this blog has just suffered a massive aneurysm due to Cognitive Dissonance and can not longer complete this tirade.  The editors would like to apologize  profusely for his shortcoming and while we are taking him to the local hospital we will try to read what he wrote and finish for him….

Sorry again, the editors have just tried to read what was already written and have also just suffered a massive aneurysm and can no longer try to salvage this post.  The rest of the post will be completed by a drunken llama.

And Now Time for Something Completely Offensive:

OK, sorry people Drunken Llama here, enough with the sarcasm and Monty Python references and on with the racist jokes.  Later we will get into something serious, so please save your anger and hate till you get to the end and then maybe we can get someplace, or you can yell at me.  But remember I don’t care, I’m  llama, and I have been drinking since noon…

Well without further ado I give you the terrible, and probably highly offensive jokes:

Really this girl wrote to Obama?  What did she think he was going to do about it?

Fuck,  sorry, I said no more Monty Python references, but it had to happen, on Obama no less, I’m a llama that’s been swilling booze all day, leave me alone…

I’m going to get shot later aren’t I?  Well since I am going to get shot anyway, on with the racism…

The only reason a white girl won is because all the black men voted for her and we all know how much they love them some white woman.  My real question is why it wasn’t a blonde girl?

God, I love that movie…

It’s true had it been an all white shool and they had one Asian girl all the white guys would have voted for her, and then tried to drop some roofies into her drink.  It was an old joke when I was in high school that if someone ever started WET (White Entertainment Channel, just like BET) it would be nothing but metal videos and Asian girls.  Because remember Asian girls are hot and white people think that they don’t know about the Woman’s Sufferage Movement and all know Kung Fu.

If it was an Asian school they would vote for the one that most closely resembled a 11 year old girl, an actual 11 year old girl (since they smart or something), or whoever has the best costume from a video game or anime.  They would then attack her with tentacles…

If it was an Hispanic school they would vote for the pregnant girl about to be deported.

If it was an Arab school they would stone the girls to death and vote for the goat.

If it was a Native American school they would still be trying to get funding for books from the Department of Indian Affairs and would not have the money for this shit.    Thank you Reservation System, assholes…

And on with offending the rest of the world:

If it was in Europe they would vote for the guy (in drag, with herpes), talk about how much more civilized and progressive they are then the backward racist homophobic Americans and then oppress any minority they saw, while completely ignoring their entire history.

If it was in Africa they would sell them all to the local militia.  Got to get child soldiers some place.

If it was in Asia they would either do the same thing as the American school or all the contestants would be 12 years old – even the boys dressed in drag -  that they would sell to dirty old westerners looking for cheep VD.  They would then attack her with tentacles…

If it was in a communist country they would shoot them all for being bourgeois and decadent.

If it was in South America they would  load up the winner with cocaine and send her to America.

In the Middle East they would rape all the contestants, stone the girls to death for adultery and then vote for the goat.

It’s just how the world works.  The world is a shitty place, not meant for the living.  Since I don’t quite think I have offended enough people I will repost an explanation of the world from the now brain dead asshole that used to write for this skidmark before his terrible fate at the hands of Doublethink, that way we can all be offended, and not just by a llama that has been sucking down scotch all day:

Asia: Angry people who like to murder millions of their own people in the name of progress, gulags, military dictatorships, the intentional mutilation of children to be used as beggars,  sexual slavery, opium and the traffic in human organs harvested from executed political prisoners.    And I love Asia and I am still talking this much shit!

Africa: Ethnic cleansing, military dictatorships, civil war, slavery, cannibalism , female genital mutilation, piracy, rape considered a legitimate military tactic, child soldiers, Islamic extremism, and entire countries controlled by warlords.

Europe: The birthplace of almost every bad idea in all of history, pussies too scared of Muslim groups they let them run wild burning down half the country, backstabbing assholes,  Arrogant bastards that think they know everything yet can barley keep their own countries functioning.

Central and South America: Junta, and other Junta, Cocaine, FARC, governments that no matter how bad they fuck up the country still try to blame it all on the US rather then the fact they are reusing failed European political ideas even though they hate Europe too , MS13, drug smugglers, tuberculosis, mass emigration to get away from the shit holes they live in and their own governments, sexual slavery,  and Ecological destruction.

Middle East: Female genital mutilation, Islamic militancy, racism, hate, rage, murder, slavery, large scale child molestation, forced child marriage, stoning homosexuals, rape victims are considered the criminals, woman are considered property and allowed to be beaten, no human rights whatsoever, sexual slavery, no religious freedom, oppression of everyone especially woman and minorities and terrorism.

America: Hippies, junkies Hollywood, welfare recipients, gang bangers, illegal immigrants with drugs and tuberculosis, journalists, public radio, collage professors, lazy scum, leaches, Scientologists, The KKK, The Black Panthers, rap music, spoiled middle class children with causes, Chicago, teachers unions, serial killers, MTV, VH1, MSNBC, communists, San Francisco, Nancy Pelosi, Harry Reid, Barney Frank, California, Georgia, New York, Michigan, Jessie Jackson, Al Sharpton, Al Gore, Louis Farrakhan and all his Nation of Islam racist assholes, Reality TV, The Daily Kos kids, Sean Penn, Mariah Carey, The Grateful Dead, Berkeley, Vegans, PETA, Keith Olbermann, The Sierra Club, George Clooney, and millions of other scum sucking fucktards that should never fucking breed.

Yep the world sucks, lets move on with some jokes about Uranus…

Wait, what the fuck!!!

Stop it…

STOP  IT…

REALLY FUCKING STOP ALREADY!!!!

Deus Ex Machina here, sorry the Drunken Llama has just been sacked.   I am not happy right now, not only has the gin soaked asshole running this interweb skidmark been committed to the hospital but so are the editors (who also suck), with little hope of ever regaining anything even pretending to be a functioning brain (it’s really only one step down for them, but it’s a big step).  On top of that a Drunken Llama has taken charge, a llama who is 1 second away from offending the rest of the galaxy on top of the hatecrimes he has already committed.  I can’t have this, I will finish this shit myself.

Once again, we apologize for everything that has been said so far and will try to stop with the Monty Python references before we get sued, anyway back to whatever the fuck the point was…

Really this whole thing is fucking stupid.  I have no idea why we still have Black Schools, really segregation is over, we need to make sure it stays that way.  We can’t live in a country were everyone has to segregate themselves from everyone else.  I know people have the freedom to do so, but it’s stupid and ignorant and while people can be stupid and ignorant but we have a duty to ourselves and our country to mock them for it.  Can people stop the bullshit and get on with their lives?  Really, it’s a fucking beauty pageant it’s already stupid do we need to make it worse?  They talk about life imitating art, this is life imitating 4chan.  If you don’t want a white woman to win a pageant in a black school stop letting white woman into black schools, and defiantly don’t let them into the pageant.  Yeah you can call me a racist for the jokes earlier all you want but I can guarantee you I hang out with a much more “diverse” crowed than any of you, and that’s not just racially or ethically, that’s also political and religious.  Do you know why I can do this?  Because friendship transcends all the bullshit, it isn’t about what country you are from, what religion you are or what your sexuality is.  It’s about people, people who understand that the most important thing is who that person is, what is in their heart, the rest is all just labels and silliness.

I am the “all singing all dancing crap of the world”, we all are, embrace it and live your lives people.  Does it make me a better person since I have “diverse” friends, hell no, it doesn’t, it can’t, it’s what is in your heart and your friends hearts that can help make you a better person, skin color is irrelevant, it’s useless.  People suck no matter where they come from, and people can be great no matter where they come from.  You should never be ashamed of your own race but you should never think your race means anything, because it doesn’t.  You are an person, an individual not a fucking Crayola color!!!  I am seriously tired of the race shit, and shit it is.  People keeps saying we need a “national conversation on race”, it’s bullshit, because America can’t have an honest conversation on race.  I can, I have had many with my friends it’s not that hard, all you need to do is go into the conversation knowing that while we might not always agree we are not going into it with bad intentions or with hate.  Most people can even agree with themselves half the time how the hell are we supposed to always agree with each other?  If you’re my age or older you all watched The Cosby Show, it didn’t matter what race you were, you loved it because it spoke to all of us.  At the same time all the white kids watched The Fresh Prince and In Living Color, why, because it was funny, it was fun, race didn’t matter it was about something bigger.  Yes there were jokes about racism in In Living Color, but it wasn’t to beat white people over the head it was to show how silly it all was.     Race is a joke, it’s a lie, and if we want to get to this Post-Racial America we need to wake the fuck up and realize this.  Race doesn’t mean anything!

Now some people are going to flat out reject everything I just said.   Some because they are pissed off about the jokes earlier, some because they don’t want to understand the truth.  Some will reject it because deep down they themselves are racist or have been brainwashed into having too much racial pride to ever let go of outdated and bullshit ideas.  Some people want to be a Crayola color, I don’t, I’m not, I never will be.

H/T to MK.   Sorry to drag you into this, but the old, and now comatose bastard that started this blog found the original news article on your site.  He started it, and after many good people (debatable) fried their brains trying to make sense of it, and one asshole llama tried to get us all in trouble with the Thought Police we have finally finished this atrocity.  I blame you, it’s sort of your fault.

I’m not going to have any readers left after this one am I?

Deus Ex Machina has just been attacked with tentacles…

She hates it here…

Obama Needs To Find Better People Or Just Admit That It’s Intentional

Really Mao Tse-Tung?   He killed more people than both Hitler and Stalin did (individually not added up).  The White House’s  Communications Director Anita Dunn claimed Mao Tse-Tung was on of her favorite political philosophers to high school students.  Obama listen to me, if you want people to stop calling you a Socialist and a Communist you need to stop surrounding yourself with people who idolize Socialists and Communists.

Mark Steyn has a good article on this one, you can read it here.

H/T Doctor Bulldog

Political Scum and the Knives In Our Soldier’s Backs

I understand deliberation, getting others opinions and taking time to make the smart choice, but you can wait forever and making quick choices can be necessary quite often in life.

We have people Dying in Afghanistan, we do not have enough combat troops on the ground and when the Generals are telling you need them, you need to listen!  They rushed the Bail-out trough real fast, not time to wait, it’s too urgent, but the second a General begs for more troops for a war the President himself said was the Necessary War”, what happens?  The President flies of to Europe to suck up to the Olympic Comity and now we get this:

“Senators diverted $2.6 billion in funds in a defense spending bill to pet projects largely at the expense of accounts that pay for fuel, ammunition and training for U.S. troops, including those fighting wars in Iraq and Afghanistan, according to an analysis.”

2.6 Billion!!!!  What the fucking hell is wrong with you people!  If you don’t want to fight the war pull them the fuck out, but if we are going to fight, win this fucking thing and fight it like it needs to be fought!!!  Yeah I’m angry, maybe it’s the fact I have watched one two many people crying over loved ones while the Government plays politics with people’s lives.  Maybe it’s because I have friends and family over there.  Maybe it’s the fact  the Government siphons off funds the troops need for their little pork projects and bullshit then the government sits on it’s hands and does nothing while our men and woman are dying over there waiting for the backup that isn’t coming!

Maybe I have a lot of reasons to be angry but it’s justified.

I’m not angry about the war, wars happen.  Yes, war is a terrible thing, unfortunately the world isn’t perfect so war is sometimes necessary.  It’s life, deal with it.  I’m angry about the fact that Washington is willing to send our boys over there to die but won’t make sure they have the funds and resources to get the job done.

2.6 BILLION!!!  You are thieves, bastards and cowards!  Every last one of you! The government took so much money from the Navy (to fight the war) that the Navy can’t even give out Reenlistment bonus anymore and can’t even afford to move people to their new duty stations during the normal rotation process (it’s called a PCS Transfer for non-military types) because of the lack of funding.  Where is the money going because it sure as hell isn’t going to making sure that we have enough men in the field to get the job done and that was the whole reason the Navy has been getting shorted on funds, so those funds could go towards making sure that the people on the front lines had the training, equipment and supplies they needed.  2.6 Billion from the fund that is for training and supplies for what?! They are sending people into the field without the supplies they need and without the training they need and without the backup they need!!!

Let me explain something to Washington D.C., yes you control the government and the President is the Commander In Chief, but you want a war fought, it’s fought by the military, and they are the ones that have to die, not you, so when the generals tell you they need more troops you fucking give it to them.  Unlike you, they have spent years in the military, they know what needs to be done, the reason Vietnam was such a fuckhole was because the war was run by the politicians in Washington and not by the soldiers that actually had to fight the thing.  Either give the soldiers what they need and get the fuck out of the way.

On a last note, if you are incumbents I will not be voting for you.  I recommend everyone else do the same, fuck it, never vote for an incumbents again. If they don’t want to make term limits we should just give them ones with our votes.  Throw all the scum out!!!

Yeah I’m angry, and if you’re not I can only imagine that you have no soul because I don’t have any other explanations.

I hate it here…

Last Target: Punk Rock From Japan

It’s really sad, these guys broke up, or I think they did, some of the wording on their website was hard to read, althoug they do have English and Japanese, some of the English is a little off (not that I’m complaining, it happens).  I didn’t know about these guys till I went to see a show this weekend to see some some other bands I know about and they were headlining it.  It was their last show, it was good and fun to go to the after-party, but sad that it was to be no more.  If it make you feal better you can get their last album  Tokyo Shakedown on iTunes and if you go to their website you can order some of the others as well as merch.

I love this band, so, so sad…

Here is some other fun from them:

The Public Schools Are Not Your Parents!

“In a locally unprecedented move, the School District of Philadelphia will hold principals accountable for the number of students eating breakfast in their schools.”

Never mind that 50% of American School children can’t read or compute at their grade level do we really need to start busting Principals for not spending less time trying to get kids to learn so they can make pancakes?  It’s sad that some kids go to school hungry but that isn’t the schools responsibility it’s the parents responsibility, and if the parents are not taking responsibility why isn’t Social Services going to the home and taking the kids out of it, that what we pay them for, right?

Another problem is that many kids don’t eat breakfast not even because their parents can’t afford it, it’s because they just don’t do it.  Yes I know they probably should, and their parents might try harder to force them, but life isn’t perfect.  I never ate breakfast after 6th grade, I still don’t except once every two weeks or so.  I’m not a morning person.  Eating first thing in the morning just makes me more tired and sluggish, I’m not malnourished or anything, I eat a big lunch and often eat several times after work.  Granted my eating habits are a little odd but  they work for me.

Now I’m not saying that every kid should be allowed to regulate their own food intake, parents should take charge and make sure that their children are getting proper meals, my parents never worried about it because they taught me to cook at a very young age, in fact I used to cook the whole family dinner myself when I was 12, and I never even pretended to look in a cookbook.  Not all the time but often enough,  and I tended to cook more often than my siblings because I was better at it.  If you want you kids to eat right teach them to cook, once they learn how they will probably enjoy it, or at least be willing to do it and they will want to try to cook and eat different things because it’s interesting and they will eat better for it.  But this brings me back to the fact that it’s the parents job to be parents.  It’s not the States job to come into my house and check to see if the turkey is a little dry, it’s my job (and it doesn’t happen ever).  The Turkey is my responsibility, since I am the one who decided to put it in the oven, the child is the parents responsibility only unlike the turkey the child is a little more important.

The problem is that segments of society expect Public Schools to be giant day-care centers they are not they are schools, they are for teaching facts and logic and they don’t even do that very well.  Think about it, the government run school can’t even teach kids to read but we are expecting them to raise the children too.  That’s insanity, yes there are terrible parents out there, but you can’t expect people to have the ability to solve all of these problems all at once.  Why don’t we fix the educational levels first, when educated become parents they have a better chance of making better decisions with raising their children and have a higher standard of living to support them.  Is that always true, no, my parents were not perfect, hell in some cases they were terrible, so much so they have apologized for it.  I don’t hate them no one is perfect, they can’t be, they are just people, flawed but people.  Many of my friend’s parents were worse, much, much worse and we all turned out fine.  Yeah there were ups and downs and other silly things but we pulled through, we made something of ourselves, from food stamps to a degree in Engineering as one example.  It can happen.  It’s not that hard, it takes personal responsibility, the one thing if nothing else that a parent needs to teach their children.  No matter how screwed up a parent is, and even if they are a hypocrite and don’t follow their own advice on that, as long as someone figures it out they will be fine.  For one of my friends, a relative, a junkie, looked at him told him not to be like him and made sure to always buy him books, got him a set of encyclopedias.  Even though he was lost he still knew that someone needed to do that, it was his family after all, and he wanted him to be better then he had been.  Granted some people can’t look at their screwed up family and learn how to be responsible from it because they don’t want to end up the same, but life isn’t perfect, it can’t be.

Back to the point, we cannot solve all the problems with parenting, ever, it’s impossible, what we can do it make the schools institutions of learning, instead of the diploma mills, child fertility fields and drug and gang dens they are now.  Public Education is screwed as it is, and now even if the Principal wants to change this we want to make him waste his time making sure the kids have enough Mrs. Butterworth’s.  Remember the book Brave New World by Aldous Huxley?  Remember the schools and how they raised children in the book?  That is were we are heading, a world were we expect impersonal bureaucrats to be loving parents, mentors and teachers to raise our children and we are absolved of any responsibility.  There is a reason Brave New World is considered a Dystopian Novel, but we keep reaching for a Utopia that cannot exist.  Utopia never could exist, the word itself is derived form the Greek words for Not and Place and basically means Nowhere or a place that cannot exist, but people love their Utopian dreams don’t they?

Before anyone starts in on the “Think of the children” argument I would like you to read my earlier comments on the subject:

“I’m sick of hearing the “Think of the children argument”, I’m not going to “think of the children”, because one, I’m not Michael Jackson, and two I don’t have any.  They are your kids, take responsibility for the choices you made in life.  But no, people can’t do that anymore and since I won’t willingly take other people’s responsibilities onto my own shoulders they resort to emotional blackmail to get me to do it anyway.  Well I won’t, if you want my money be honest about it and just try to mug my ass, and I’ll do to you what I do to all muggers and put a .40 S&W Hydra-Shok through your rib cage.  Seriously though, politicians and the teachers unions have been using this crap for years over our schools, and we keep following them and our school keep getting worse, why because it’s a joke! The politicians and unions do this to get more of your money, and the parents do this because they don’t want to have to be parents, and we all pay the price, even the kids (who you need to think about you insensitive bastard).”

I’m not here to raise you kids for you, I’m not even here to raise my relatives kids for them.  However if one of my close friends or relatives and asked me to take care of their kids in case they died I would, unless I knew I couldn’t do it and would tell them to find someone better.  Why would I raise their children and not yours?  Because it’s family and close friends it’s different, I care about them, family is family, even the ones you aren’t related too.  It’s a responsibility, I give myself, as it would be my freedom not too.

No I am not here to raise other peoples kids, or pay for them, the difference is that with my friends and family I care about them, you I don’t know, you don’t care about me, I’m not here to care about you.  What I would tell them out of love, I would tell you out of hate, and I’ll be worse.  I’m not here to fix your problems, I can give advice, but I’m not going to solve your problems for you, it’s your life deal with it, live it!  But people don’t want to do that, people don’t want to deal with their own lives, they want other people to do it for them, and there are a million elitists, charlatans, busy-bodies and psychopaths willing to let them.  Naive or power hungry it doesn’t matter, they all line up waiting, helping you into slavery.  Freedom is about responsibility, and both are terrifying to the weak or lazy, and both are hated by the tyrants, petty and large.  The Emotional Blackmail is not going to work here, so sell it someplace else.

Should kids eat breakfast, yes.   Should it be the schools job, no!

On a lighter note I give you these videos from Steven  Crowder and Andrew Klavan: