Israel, Palestine and fun

I wrote a post a bit ago about the Israel Palestinian thing and how to get peace there and I still think it is worth looking at.

So without further ado here are my recommendations to Israel:

1.  Wall off the Gaza strip and the west bank and let the Palestinians have it.

2.  Wall off Jerusalem from the Palestinians and never let a single one of them get anywhere near the city.

3.  Explain to the new Palestinian state that they are now on there own and to have fun making a life for themselves they got the land back.

4.  Further explain that any violence from the new Palestinian state directed toward Israel will be considered a declaration of war and will be met with such overwhelming force that entire Palestinian country will be called “New Carthage” for all eternity.

5.  Peace…

As a bonus I’ll give you this from TownHall:

hamas

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My New Year’s resolutions or something.

happynewyearSince it’s New Years Eve I figured I would do the normal thing I guess and put out a couple little resolutions or promises for 2009 or something like that.

1.  Try not to die.  Really why not, it sounds like a good one.  Plus if I screw this one up it’s not like I’m going to have to try it all over again next year.

2.  I promise to spend as much time as I can making fun of or yelling at Obama.  Why you ask?  Because I don’t much like him and the egotistical little prick needs it.

3.  As every year I will not have sex with a lamp.  In reality I use this one every year and have never fucked it up yet.  Sometimes it’s the small victories that make life worth living.

4.  More ranting drunks… umm… Drunken Rants…  Or, well, maybe I’ll just pretend to update and post more on this thingy.  I know most people out there would rather I not do this but if it makes you unhappy I am more than pleased to do so.

5. Move to another country.  No it isn’t because of Obammers I was going to do this anyway.  Granted Obammers doesn’t much make me want to stay here, but I’m not one of the idiots that claim they will move out of the country if their candidate doesn’t win, then doesn’t do it.

6.  I will stop sending my friends mail order brides as a joke.

7.  When at all possible I will try to punch every person with a Che Guevara T-shirt.  In the event that the person wearing the shirt is a child I will punch the shit out of the kids parents.  If it is a woman and since I don’t hit woman I will rename said woman Carl, Andrew or Peter and proceed punch the shit out of the guy.

8.  I will attempt to get the age restrictions for the presidency removed so I can run for President in 2012.  Mostly likely my 2012 New Years resolution will be to try to to get assassinated.

9.  I will spend more time throwing road kill at vegans.

10.  I will start attending church regularly… I will go to church sometimes… I will go to church at least once… I will drive past a church at some point.

11.  I will make several girls very lucky by not asking them out for a date.

12.  I will Spend more time watching Korean gangster films.

13.  I will do everything possible to become the dictator of a small Asian country if I cannot do anything with number 8.  I’m looking at you Burma better watch yourself…

14.  I will stop and smell the flowers, but only once.  Then I will pave over the garden.

“An optimist stays up until midnight to see the New Year in. A pessimist stays up to make sure the old year leaves”.  – Bill Vaughan

“The proper behavior all through the holiday season is to be drunk. This drunkenness culminates on New Year’s Eve, when you get so drunk you kiss the person you’re married to”.  – P. J. O’Rourke

NOTE: If you think number 6 is  fucked up you are correct, however it’s not as fucked up as the fact that two of my friends kept theirs.

Stalin, Russia’s Third Greatest Person?

“A Russian state television network says Soviet dictator Josef Stalin, who sent millions to their deaths in the Great Purge of the 1930s, has been voted the country’s third-greatest historical figure.”

You have got to be fucking kidding me!!!

What didn’t the fucking asshat kill enough people to make it all the way to number one or something?  Granted it does make sense in a country run by ex KGB officers.  If they would elect them into office they must have a soft spot for Stalin.

Well not everyone might have a soft spot of Stalin’s commie mass-murdering ass since in second place was “Pyotr Stolypin — a prime minister under turn-of-the-century czar Nicholas II — who suppressed leftist revolutionaries.”   It does sound like quite a bit of people in Russia where trying to say something without getting the usual dose of Polonium.

Seriously though back to the point Stalin killed more people then Hitler did!   Great guy that Stalin fellow is great guy.   I just hope he was really voted up there for the historical reasons to help the Russian people remember not to ever let a bastard like that take control again and not because he is admired.

Just in case you didn’t know the truth about guns.

It’s true, very very true.

h/t Pissed off Tree Rat

More music The Crimson Ghosts’ “Somewhere in a Casket”

Ah German horror punk you got to love it.

Satuday night music fun with The Creepshow

The Butcher of La Cabaña, The real Che.

che_guevara_time_magazine“To send men to the firing squad, judicial proof is unnecessary. These procedures are an archaic bourgeois detail. This is a revolution! And a revolutionary must become a cold killing machine motivated by pure hate.” – Che Guevara

I see no difference in a person who idolizes Mao Zedong, Joseph Stalin, Adolf Hitler, Pol Pot or Che Guevara.

Wait, why would Che be on that list?  Well because he was a totalitarian mass murdering scum bag that’s why you twit.  Granted he didn’t get a chance to kill as many people as the others but it’s not like he wouldn’t have if he could. He didn’t get the nickname “The Butcher of La Cabaña” for nothing.  La Cabaña being Castro’s main political prison in case you didn’t know.

Here is the words spoken by Javier Arzuaga to Alvaro Vargas Llosa about La Cabaña and Che:

“there were about eight hundred prisoners in a space fit for no more than three hundred: former Batista military and police personnel, some journalists, a few businessmen and merchants. The revolutionary tribunal was made of militiamen. Che Guevara presided over the appellate court. He never overturned a sentence. I would visit those on death row at the galera de la muerte. A rumor went around that I hypnotized prisoners because many remained calm, so Che ordered that I be present at the executions. After I left in May, they executed many more, but I personally witnessed fifty-five executions. There was an American, Herman Marks, apparently a former convict. We called him “the butcher” because he enjoyed giving the order to shoot. I pleaded many times with Che on behalf of prisoners. I remember especially the case of Ariel Lima, a young boy. Che did not budge. Nor did Fidel, whom I visited. I became so traumatized that at the end of May 1959 I was ordered to leave the parish of Casa Blanca, where La Cabaña was located and where I had held Mass for three years. I went to Mexico for treatment. The day I left, Che told me we had both tried to bring one another to each other’s side and had failed. His last words were: “When we take our masks off, we will be enemies.”

Here is another fun fact about this little idol of Useful Idiots everywhere:

“Che set up the first forced labor camp, Guanahacabibes, in 1960. This camp was the precursor to the eventual systematic confinement, starting in 1965 in the province of Camagüey, of dissidents, homosexuals, AIDS victims, Catholics, Afro-Cuban priests, and other such scum, under the banner of Unidades Militares de Ayuda a la Producción, or Military Units to Help Production. Herded into buses and trucks, the “unfit” would be transported at gunpoint into concentration camps organized on the Guanahacabibes mold. Some would never return; others would be raped, beaten, or mutilated; and most would be traumatized for life, as Néstor Almendros’s wrenching documentary Improper Conduct showed the world a couple of decades ago.”

Yes Guanahacabibes was Cuba’s first gulag isn’t that cute. He even executed children as young as 14.  To say the least he was a nice person.  He really was.  So go on and wear that chic little Che shirt and be proud of yourself.  Make movies idolizing him and win the accolades of your scum sucking peers in Hollywood.  Never mind the trail of bodies he man left on two different continents.  History and truth are irrelevant.

Fucking douchebags…

“Hatred as an element of struggle; unbending hatred for the enemy, which pushes a human being beyond his natural limitations, making him into an effective, violent, selective, and cold-blooded killing machine. This is what our soldiers must become … ” – Che Guevara

che-jokes