Adventures In Japan: Population Growth, Man Purses and WTF?

Civilizations die from suicide, not by murder. – Arnold J. Toynbee

I cannot say that is always true.  They can die from murder the small ones the most but even the large ones.  It’s a combination, they let themselves rot from within to the point that they either go by suicide or they rot to the point that it makes them easy picking for the rape and murder by others.  Toynbee was smart but that doesn’t mean that his analysis is always correct or sacred in some way that it isn’t up for debate.

Japan, however does fit his mold of suicide.  I’m not talking about the above average suicide rate in Japan I’m talking about the population growth, or well the lack there of.  It’s said that to support the current economies in a Post-Industrial Society you need a population growth of 2.3%.  2.3% is considered a healthy population growth.  This is because of the large amounts of programs the government pays for and the fact that due to the aging populations of many countries you need a healthy population growth to pay for them through taxes.  2.3% is the minimum necessary in any Post-Industrial Nation.  Japan, like much of Europe has less than 2% and that can lead to demographic suicide and economic collapse*.

OK, so the population of Japan is in decline and I want to help them out.  I love this country sometimes more than America sometimes.  It has a lot less Liberal hippie douchebags and a lot more Japanese women, but they need to get a Second Amendment, get rid of their Ninth Amendment and stop taxing fucking everything including air and waking up in the morning.  But we are not talking about all that right now we are talking about the population problems.  I want to help them out (and not just by trying to have a lot of sex, although I am willing to do that one too).  So what is the problem, the problem that is causing this population decline?

Man-Purses.  No, I’m not talking about a man-bag, like the messenger bags or the half messenger bag/brief case thing that can function like a briefcase and a backpack in one.  I’m talking about actual purses carried by men!  Yes folks men in Japan walk around with purses (not old men and not everyone mind you) but enough do that it’s a rather common sight**.  I’m not even saying gay men, you watch a strait man walking around with his girlfriend and they both have a purse.  Look, you used to be Samurai and now you spend hours on you hair and walk around with a purse?  No wonder no one is getting pregnant.  Even if some bi chick is into you because to her you are “the best of both worlds” your sperm, even if it hasn’t been destroyed by the level of estrogen in your system, is too embarrassed  to come out and try anything.  I’ve seen strait men in Japan wear things the most annoyingly flamboyant  gay guy in San Francisco would you call you a fag for wearing (or is it carry, fuck if I know).

No, that bag is his.  And now time for another Japanese couple.

Oh God, what have you done? I don’t think those shoes were meant for men either…  Wait there’s more?  Why?????

Stop it, just stop it already!

Japan has taken metrosexual to a new level, a new disturbing level (well it is all disturbing in the first place but they got worse).  I should probably blame Johnny & Associates (known as just Johnny’s) for this.  The legions of J-pop boy bands that they produce every second and the disturbing rumors of what they do to their underage slaves pop stars behind closed doors.  But it can’t all be their fault and anyone who has spent any time in Tokyo would know that the best way to describe much of the Japanese fashion world would be to use the term “insanity” quite often but this is to far.  Please Japan, stop it with the man purse and start fucking or you won’t be around any more and that would make me sad, very very sad.

This is Johnny’s fault right here.

And so is this.

This however  isn’t Johnny’s fault and I have no way of explaining this picture…

Now these next guys are not Japanese and this is from a fashion show in Italy but it’s a good hint.  The one on the left is pretending that’s a briefcase (it’s not).  The one one the right has a woman’s purse (made for men?).  The one in the middle’s sperm might not be completely embarrassed and actually work and thus forces him to be Italy’s only hope in ethnic survival (Well if he is Italian, I have no idea).  Be afraid be very, very afraid…

Now maybe I just don’t understand fashion.  To be fair mostly I don’t since most of the things people call fashionable look stupid and most of the things in fashion shows are incredibly ugly and insanely stupid looking.  Most of it makes no sense and does not even pretend to look comfortable so why wear it?  I understand what a suit is and why we wear them, they look good and they have a function.  I understand slacks or nice jeans and a button up shirt or nice sweater.  I understand all the parts of fashion or at least clothing people need to own and wear if they want to get a real job and it looks good so why fuck with it?  I know I’m not fancy and like jeans a t-shirts because they are comfortable but I know what is or is not appropriate and in what situations.  Everyone like their style, or likes to imitate someone else’s style.  I understand that but man purses?  Really?

*Some places in Europe such as Russia or Italy will be technically halving their populations every generation if they keep going the way they are.  While this sounds good to the environmental nuts that hate people (I hate people too but for different less stupid reasons) this will lead to economic collapse as the population gets older and does not have enough young people around to sustain them economically through taxation or even through direct support.  It’s hard for one person to support his 4 grandparents and his own parents while at the same time attempting to have a family of his own.  China will also collapse from the same thing due to the large male/female imbalance that will not be able to sustain their large population.  In this case many of the male population doesn’t even have a chance of creating his own family and it will lead to rapid population decline and potential civil unrest.  Yes, China thinks they are cool now but give them 15-30 years and unless they figure out a way to fix their shit they will collapse.  They might end up better for it later but it’s going to be a while.  Now none of this is meant to say that continual population growth is a good thing, there is a point were it is too much.  People will need to eventually lessen the hand of government and allow the population to find an equilibrium so that the young can support the old without making it too economically costly to do so.  It would require that people are responsible enough for themselves to plan for their retirement and not expect to be taken care of by their relatives or the government.  Now I know things do happen but as it is now the system is broke and it can’t be fixed until people take a much stronger role in their own lives.

** Last time I was in the US I did notice several high school boys walking around with the tiny little half purse half backpack things that was really popular with women, I think they might still be.  That was odd enough but it wasn’t enough to make a judgment on if it was something very common, just picking up steam or an aberration.  Hell, by now it might be all over the place in the US but since I haven’t been there in almost a year I wouldn’t really know.  If you are an American man go out and either get a messenger bag or a real backpack and stop it right now before it’s too late.