Breaking News: Possible Zombie Outbreak In Texas

Unconfirmed Reports Of Possible Zombie Outbreak In Texas:

Authorities Have Little To Say, Cover-up?  You Decide.

By T. YAMAMOTO Copyright 2010 Letters To A Dying Dream
Feb. 18, 2010, 7:27PM

There have been reports on internet message boards that a possible Zombie outbreak may occur in Texas, so far no location has been established as of yet but residents should stay watchful for anything out of the ordinary and to contact the authorities if they suspect anything. A Texas woman calling herself Sophie left this cryptic message on a popular confession board:

“Today, after recently having had surgery, I Iearnt that some extra tissue was needed to cover up the hole in the roof of my mouth. Where did they get this tissue? From a dead person. I now have the flesh of a dead person in my mouth, which by the way is now infected. FML”

Dr. Bahadur Singh MD the Acting Director Of Otolaryngology at the Centers for Disease Control in Atlanta was quoted in saying that “while skin grafts are common, using necrotic tissue in the mouth is not standard for this type of operation and due to the health risks involved is not something any legitimate medical professional would do.  Now since we have yet to find the source of this and do a thorough medical exam on the patient in question it may be premature to jump to any conclusions.”

When called for comment a source within the Governor’s office – who spoke with us on the condition of anonymity because he was not authorized to speak to the press – had this to say:

“While zombie sighting are occasionally reported they usually turn out to be a hoax or a a misunderstanding.  In 2008 some high school students claimed to have seen zombies occupying the Toyota Center in Huston on the night of February 19th.  When the responding officers got there it turned out to be a political rally.  However, as it is now with this case we cannot confirm or deny that there have been any true zombie sightings in the state of Texas and our standard answer is that zombies do not exist in order not to create mass hysteria before all the facts are in and the Governor along with agencies form the Federal Government can coordinate a workable strategy”.

Rumors of a possible cover-up have been widely reported in the Blogosphere leading some people to begin preparations on their own.  Jerome Butler from Eglin a city 28 miles east of Austin, when interviewed claimed that “he wasn’t taking any chances” and planned on making a trip to some local sporting goods and hardware stores on his way home from work.  “I have a wife and two daughters and I’m not going to take any chances with their lives” he said.   Other Eglin residents weren’t so worried.  Sarah Hernandez,  Jerome’s Neighbor, when interviewed only had this to say on the matter; “Who cares?  Really we have enough problems in this world like Global Warming, who has time to worry about silly this like zombies?  If the Government doesn’t say anything about it I’m inclined not to pay any attention.”

As of yet no Hospital in Texas has yet to comment on this situation and have not returned this reporters calls.

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21 Comments

  1. Hell I have my zombie plan all ready. There is a cemetary a mile down the road from me. I’ve had that shit down for years. Hell my mom even has a zombie plan. lol I convinced her that ya never know what could happen. I scared her but damn it’s better to be prepared than act like a deer in the headlights when the shit is going down. You never know when the shit could happen…

  2. Lol gotta love the zombie plan………………… I also have a how to deal with retards plan that comes in handy……

  3. 2012 nothin yet.

  4. wow anyone believing that there is going to be zombies needs to be put in an asylum. retards

  5. Anyone who reads this and complains like it is a real news article needs to be put in an asylum.

    And to the Optimist remember zombies are slow give them a bit to warm up.

  6. every1 says zombies are fake well look up wat happend in miami

  7. Not just Miami, in Texas, Louisiana, Nebraska, and Maryland also! i hope when “optimist” heard about them he/she felt like a dumb ass =)

  8. Ok I’m not gonna waste my time. My plan is to just get bitten one time, and run, so I will turn into a zombie later. Why would you want to be the only people left, and they are just gonna come for ya.

  9. Is a zombie really possible ive been reading up after hearing that scientist has come up with a virus causing a zombie like person now after hearing that and hearing about the man chewing another mans face off i got to be honest its made me a little nervous

  10. My zombie plan cry like fuck awww my biggest nighmare id just kill ma self they can eat me after im dead lol

  11. Damn it I want a zombie plan too… but I don’t even know how to even prepare and it feel like it require a lot of work… -_- in any case in particular is chopping the head the only weakness… I lack in arm strength and there’s gonna be a lot since there a lot of dead people on the ground…T-T

  12. My advise is to buy an island that can easily be fortified and has easy access to food and water then stock up on guns and medicine. Since you can’t afford that make friends with a rich person and get them to do it and let you tag along.

  13. The best thing to do.watch Zombieland and get some directions ,its.shows step by step ,for those who dont know…goodluck!!! As for me I got my plan…; ))

  14. my family think i am stupid for being a zeiber [zombie believer] but they are the dumb ones. becuz i am ready for the zombie apocolypse. good luck ya`ll =]

  15. Quick Tips
    1. good cardio
    2. access to food, water, shelter, weapons, and a vehicle.
    3. if u help someone make sure there not bitten. help survivors
    4. STAY ALIVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    5. check the backseat 4 zombies
    6. ALWAYS BE ALERT
    7. SHOOT THE ZOMBIES IN THE HEAD
    8. DOUBLE TAP. SHOOT/HIT TWICE
    9. MAKE SURE ZOMBIES ARE DEAD.
    10. FIND A SURVIVOR VILLAGE/place. good luck 🙂

  16. The trick to surviving isn’t having alot of guns, it’s having ALOT of Ammo! All someone needs is 2 or 3 Good guns that are easily accessible, easy to maintain, and does alot of Damage!
    Extra Magazines are wise and a few melee weapons are strongly encouraged! Get extremely comfortable with ALL your weapons… because the Worst thing you could do is Hesitate!
    Stock up on MREs, water purifying tablets & learn to make a Fire without using matches or a lighter. Those won’t last as long as you’d like ’em to… Therefore, learn all you can from what & who you can… while you still can!
    Good Hunting & Kick Ass!!

  17. My name is Greg Wynn… age 14… I live in Paris, Texas. I have expierence with a gun and survival knife because i am a hunter… I strongly believe that the zombie apocolypse will occur.. and its coming soon… some of my tips i would strongly reccomend… get in shape.. you will need to run sooner or later… you can’t be scared… if you show mercy to the living dead… your gonna be a ghouls meal… form a group no more than 10 people… the more people.. the faster your gonna lose supplies… make sure you can trust the people in your group… you will never make it alone… when you go to attack the living dead… try to shatter the skull and destroy the brain…. repeatedly attack the ghoul in the head when its down… as some people suggested.. double tap… if anyone wants to team or talk to me email me: karatewynn@gmail.com
    I’m called karate wynn cause I know a few forms of martial arts…

  18. I’m back again..ha… everyone who readz tbis… no this… the zombie APOCOLYPSE may of not started yet… but you could drive,walk,pedal,whatever… you may pass one and not even know it… trust me… if any of you think that staying in your house with a machete… maybe even a pistol or any other type of firearm… if you think that will save y’all… you better think again… eventually… the walking dead will locate you and your fortress of safety.. and they won’t leave… Rule 1: don’t rely on thesafety of your own home… and the undead wont be and shouldnt be your only worry…so his food and especially water… without these… you won’t last long… Rule 2: pack enough water and food to last you as long as it possibly can… and if any of you people thinks that the apocolypse wont happen…well in the future… when I’m one of the last people on earth… ill be doing what all the people who die or become undead couldn’t do… the impossible.. ill be surviving… so hopefully… we can team up..and survive… or you can be on your own

  19. I’ve highly trained myself I’ve got a plan I know how to use any kind of weapon and some tips are aim for the head if you don’t have a gun use blunt objects and always watch your back

  20. Hey… raymond?

  21. Does anyone need training… and oes anyone here live in or close to paris texas


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